YOU WRONGED ME!!! or did you??

I have been reading a book called "The Advantage" by Patrick Lencioni and the premise is about building a healthy team...

In the book he talks about the importance of building a COHESIVE team; that trusts one another.  One of the important factors in overcoming trust issues is recognizing within ourselves the "FUNDAMENTAL ATTRIBUTIVE ERROR"

This error, that occurs within the human condition is quite simply this - when I am wronged, it is because the person who wronged me is an evil, greedy, manipulative, spiteful wretch of a human being.  However, when I wrong someone else - it is because my situation/environment/upbringing caused me to be this way; thus making it not REALLY my fault!

As I read these words - a whole new understanding of how I view conflict and relationship strain opened up for me.  I don't know about you, but when I feel slighted or wronged, I find the worst in people to blame and I take it intensely personal!  However, if I find that I have offended someone else; it was because I am a busy man who makes mistakes and WOULD NEVER intentionally hurt anyone else.

What a crazy double standard!!!!

Wouldn't life and relationships be so much better if instead of justifying ourselves and blaming everyone else; we gave one another the benefit of the doubt and sought to understand each other and extended grace upon grace?